Last week I watched Shake slowly die. I like to thing he pined to death from the loss of his buddy Bake but the horrible truth may be that Kristin and I murdered our fish in some way. Still he had a good run for a beta fish, well compared to my sister’s fish survival rate anyway. We now have this empty fish tank still full of water as a sort of a shrine and are contemplating when will get our next victims.
Last night during dinner with my sister, Wes, and friends it was asked if I ever had a nickname, like Pat or such. This reminded me of my Middle School friend Leah Cooper who dubbed me Patty like the Hole band drummer after I wistfully mentioned once that I would have liked a nickname (now of course I love my name and would never want a nickname). Leah passed away while I was away on my trip. We had lost touch long ago though I had remained friends with her older sister Meredith.
One of the things I’ll always remember about Leah is her kindness toward me. She took pity on a rather shy, scared, and very awkward girl in our Home Economics class in 6th grade. I had just gone from a small country elementary school to a much larger middle school which was leaving me very unsettled and overwhelmed. I did take comfort in the fact that all the other kids from my country school looked as nervous me. I was also excited at the possibility of getting out of my status as class nerd and maybe make some friends. Unfortunately I was very shy and terrified of actually talking to people I didn’t know. Leah was so gregarious that she just started talking to me in our Home Ec. class since we were seated together in a group. In fact she started teasing me the first day but not in the mean way people had done to me earlier. I started looking forward to this class and eventually gained a best friend. I now had someone to eat lunch with and talk with in PE. I even got to visit her at home and we eventually went on some family trips together. The friendship trickled away before I left Middle School as we were both a little messed up and the relationship wasn’t healthy anymore. It wasn’t a dramatic break, just a slow change of interest and less and less time together until it became a nod in the hallway.
If I really think about it, Leah was one of my first good friends and basically taught me how to be a friend. She helped one little girl gain a little more confidence in herself. I know that I was just one of many as anyone who knew her would say how friendly she was and non-judgmental of others. She could and did talk to everyone. While she would tease her friends she didn’t approve of malicious teasing and made a point of befriending the social outcasts of the school….outcasts like me.
Thank you Leah, I will always remember you fondly. May you rest in peace.
Love,
Patience
Work’s been kicking my ass since we got back so I haven’t been able to write about the trip. It was perfect – not in the sense that there were no conflicts, but in the sense that it was exactly what I needed. I feel like time moves so quickly right now. For instance, we have just hit our one year anniversary for owning our home. I feel like the past year has flown by. I’m so used to a week going by before I’ve had time to process it. It was so rewarding to be able to slow down during this trip. It was possible to lose track of time and even the day of the week. I haven’t felt something like that since we had summer vacations (the kind where I didn’t work but sat back and just let go for a whole summer). I miss that feeling. Most of the time right now I feel like I’m rushing to keep up.
On top of just relaxing and getting away for awhile the location was gorgeous. The water was sparkling turquoise in color, so clean and clear you could see the bottom of the ocean at 30 feet or more. The snorkeling was great. The fish were beautiful and diverse and not shy about coming right up to you. It was fun to get to experience all of it with Wes. He had a lot of firsts on this trip. It was his first time sleeping on a boat, first time to the British Virgin Islands, first time snorkeling, first time to see a shooting star, etc. I think he did great and I know he had a blast.
Of course the second we landed back in St. Louis we were back on our normal racetrack time. We got home at midnight, left the next morning by 10:30am to drive to Bloomington for a wedding. Then off again the next day at 10am to drive home for mother’s day. Then over to Marcie’s house for dinner and time with Wes’s mom and the kids. Then back home to crash. I’ve been falling asleep every night before 11pm since we got back. I’m also waking up before 7am. Of course that helps me get to work on time. 
I’ll check back in later with some book reviews. I managed to finish three during the trip! Woo! I haven’t even touched one since we got back. Go figure!